Losing It

I spanked my son for the first time today. It was at bath time, as he was wailing, screaming and stomping in the tub. Straight on his wet bum, no diapers. It got red and I felt super guilty and even more upset that I hit myself on the thigh too. I hit myself so hard my hand made a red mark. Guilty.

Where has my sweet baby gone? His tantrums have been unbearable for the past months that I literally am starting to lose my hair – I found a bald spot on my head where my alopecia used to be. My doctor said causes of alopecia are unknown, but one common denominator among those with this condition is STRESS. Hmm, I wonder where my stress is coming from. I hope this phase passes before I lose all my hair.


Nancy Yi said...

Awe Mel,

I know this is a few months late, but I am sad for you and Milo.

I think we all make mistakes and our kids are designed to forget these early ones, because we are still learning to be parents. (:

meL said...

I think we're also allowed to make tons of mistakes. We're only human after all. We're all doing the best we can as parents, right, and as you said, we're all learning - everyday. Good luck to us :)

I’m a new mom and this is my story. I’m sharing with you my moments of joy, tears, excitement, and every other emotion that comes with being a mom, whether you’re a new mom yourself, a veteran mom, a mom-to-be, even a dad-to-be. Learn from my experience, or reminisce about your own. Welcome to this mom’s world!